Every fish and chip shop serves the state’s best fish and chips, and that’s a fact not worth quarrelling with.
And every good chippy will tell you her beach is the best.
“Of course it is,” says Di Heywood.
At Angler’s Anchorage, the only fish and chip shop at Werribee South beach, she’s serving the state’s best fish and chips at the state’s best beach.
“It’s [Werribee South beach] secluded. Not a lot of people know about it, it’s rural and it’s just out of Werribee.”
Holding the phone to her ear, she peers out the shop’s window.
“The water’s a grey-greeny colour, with a few little white caps out there and a few little fishing boats.”
Are there any local secrets she can share, tips to get the best out of Werribee South?
“Richard”, she yells across the cafe, “are there any local secrets?”
Richard can’t think of any. Heywood furrows her brow. She can only think of one secret: “it beats Altona hands down”.
Werribee South might be the western side of the bay’s best-kept-beach-secret.
The clean sand runs on for ages, the battered jetty points like a gnarled finger out into the breakers, and it’s rarely busy. There areshowers and parking at the nearby caravan park.
But of course, every chippy worth their salt has got a best-kept-beach-secret.
You can also find the state’s best fish and chips at Beach Bites, a neon-blue brick box propped up on the Esplanade at Altona Beach. Which is also the best beach in the west.
Bites’ manager Kristen Pelletier likes the “old-school” nature of Altona’s sandy strip.
“It’s [Altona Beach] awesome, yep. It’s got a really nice esplanade that a lot of people walk on, it’s got a really safe swimming area for kids, and it’s got really nice sand, quite pretty.”
Unlike other nearby beaches, the wave of development has not yet ridden right up to Altona’s edge. Houses are still small and weathered. Much like the harbour that shelters it, Altona has the feel of a place still slightly sheltered from the outside world, says Pelletier.
“A lot of kids can come down here independently and walk down the street to the beach.
“It has not been overdeveloped on the beach, there’s quite a few old houses, it’s not really fancy-fancy. It’s quite old school.”
John Zoudiaris has been at the Rotunda at Williamstown for 13 years, long enough to perfect his chip game – which is also the best in the state.
Which is lucky, because Williamstown beach is the best beach in the state, and what’s a good beach without a good chip shop?
Williamstown’s setup is a little odd, because, unlike most beach towns, the main drag is located a long way from the actual beachhead. That means non-locals will often end up missing the beach entirely, says Zoudiaris.
“We don’t have too many people that know about the beach.
“A lot of people have come down here from the west, and they did not know about the beach. When you come down to Williamstown, the main shopping drag is on the other side looking to Melbourne.
“We’re facing Geelong. They don’t even know about Williamstown beach.”
This story first appeared in The Age